The Noom dietBy Tom Dougherty
4 February 2020
On second thought, the Noom diet drives you insane
About two months back, I was waxing poetic about the increasingly popular Noom diet. I was all ga-ga about the program and thought it different than all the other fad diets. So much so I said it shouldn’t be called a fad.
Now a dozen weeks into the program, I’m offering a mea culpa. It was too good to be true — the honeymoon period is over, friends. The Noom brand bites big-time ass.
It began with such potential. The Noom diet considers the individual and prompts them to self-analysis. Dieters locate core beliefs and unlock a unique plan. This is developed through the Socratic method, which, as I mentioned in our last spin on Noom, is a commodity in our brand training.
Hit up Google and you’ll find skeptics of the diet. But my spin is a bit different.
The Noom diet simply wears you out
As you sink into the Noom diet process, you are given both an individual coach (who can text you within the app) and a group thread moderated by an additional coach. Before too long, my Noom inbox was blowing up like a pan of Jiffy-Pop. The first day or two was fine. But damn, after a week, it grew annoying and time-consuming. What’s more, several of the posts from the individual coach were canned responses.
“I had such hopes for the Noom diet because of its personality-based model. Instead, it’s just a marketing ploy, guaranteed to annoy you. Guess it doesn’t know much about my personality after all.”
Soon enough, I wrote my coach pleading with her to communicate less and to take me off the group board. They obliged, thankfully. Because it was driving me insane.
The biggest joke, however, are the daily health readings. Those on the Noom diet are provided with four to five health articles and quizzes a day, all peppered with overly witty copy.
Superficially, this seems fine. But after a month, Noom sucks the life right out of ya. Believe me. The Noom diet is just like the emotional vampire from What We Do in the Shadows TV show. It throws every little tidbit about health your way in the hope that something will stick. Soon enough, the dieter taps out, drained of all interest.
I had such hopes for the Noom diet because of its personality-based model. Instead, it’s just a marketing ploy, guaranteed to annoy you. Guess it doesn’t know much about my personality after all.
1 March 2021The Microsoft Surface ad still doesn’t get it The newest Microsoft Surface ad aims to replicate the brilliant I’m a Mac I’m a PC ads from years ago. You remember those spots. Starring Justin Long and John Hodgman, they compared the brands as personalities....
24 February 2021The General Insurance Company does the unthinkable Nearly all marketing and branding efforts fail because brands simply refuse to be honest with themselves. That’s why the brand refresh, as it’s calling it, from The General Insurance Company is so...
17 February 2021Why are local TV stations still branded by a number? There are many reasons why local TV stations are falling behind. But here’s one to consider. Why do they continue to brand themselves with an outdated number? I’ll give you an example. Here in North...