Palm device

Tom Dougherty, CEO – Stealing Share

16 October 2018

A Palm device is back. Yay.

Here is a novel idea. How about all these aging tech companies — you know, those unwilling to give up the ghost — just send me their extra cash. That way, they won’t need to use it to embarrass themselves with ridiculous products anymore. Think Blackberry with its tactile keyboard phones. Well, just Blackberry cell phones in general. More absurd than that, however, is a new Palm device. Yes, like the Palm Pilot.

Let me explain this new Palm device. It’s not a phone, but rather, a phone extension for apps already on your phone. Because we need that.

Palm deviceSays Roger Cheng, a reporter from CNet: “The new Palm isn’t a phone but a companion mobile device that looks like a baby iPhone. It’s designed to act as a lightweight substitute when you’re at the gym, at a club or spending time with your family. The $349 device, sold exclusively in the US by Verizon Wireless, will pair up with your existing phone but has its own cellular radio that requires an additional $10 charge on your monthly wireless bill.”

I’m sorry. W in the bloody TF.

I am here to say it now. Stop production. Call it a loss and cash in the chips. Then go retire. And remember what once was.”

My answer to the Palm device question? No!

I liken the Palm device to the first series of the Apple Watch (we’re on series 4 now, by the way). But it makes much less sense than that. Because this thing isn’t even a wearable. It’s a palm-sized mirror of your already small cell phone. A cell phone, may I add, that you can buy arm bands for while working out.

I am here to say it now. Stop production. Call it a loss and cash in the chips. Then go retire. And remember what once was.

The Palm brand is one of failure. There was a day — about 20 years ago — when it was briefly one of the most coveted products in CompUSA. I remember the times well. But it’s failed in ever conceivable way since. So, as the great George Harrison proclaims, “All Things Must Pass.”

And so should this Palm device.

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